Post-divorce dating is for individuals who have gone through the life-changing divorce process and came out in one piece. It’s a little complicated because divorcees go through a lot of painful and challenging experiences throughout the process. For some, the recovery period can take years; for others, the healing time can be shorter. There are others who prefer to go back to the social scene to forget all the pain and humiliation (in some cases). However, dating someone just because you want to forget an unpleasant experience is wrong. It’s one of the things you should not do when considering dating after divorce. Here are three more post-divorce dating mistakes you must not do.
- Deciding to go out on a date because you pity yourself.
This is wrong no matter what angle you look at it from. Using someone to make you feel better about yourself is wrong. It is not proper practice. Do not ever use someone, so you’ll feel good. Go out on a date only because you want to and because you are now ready to move on. First off, though; stop pitying and feeling sorry for yourself. You asked for a divorce and broke up with your boyfriend/girlfriend because you caught him/her cheating. So, why should you pity yourself? Why should you feel bad about the whole thing? Get up and live your life all over again!
- Don’t expect too much from your date. Don’t expect him/her to be your savior.
Your date is not Superman or Supergirl. He/She cannot fill up the emptiness inside you. When asked what made you decide to finally go out with him/her, do not say, “I felt so empty and alone, so I decided to meet with you. I know you’re fun to be with, so I’m sure I’ll eventually forget this feeling of emptiness inside me!” That is not the proper way to treat a well-meaning date! Don’t expect too much from your date. Just enjoy every moment and let things be.
- Never ever mention your ex to your date.
This is something that a lot of people find difficult to avoid. It’s not easy, but it has to be done. If you keep talking about your ex, how in the world will you be able to forget him/her? How will you be able to move on? Also, don’t you think talking about your ex to your date is disrespectful? If you keep doing this, your date will eventually get tired (and hurt) and decide to stop seeing you. Or worse, he/she will decide to disappear without saying a word.